Monday, June 25, 2007

Updates all over the place

My Niece
Her court date was week before last. The judge was NOT happy about the plea bargain where my niece would do 10 years probation and told her so in no uncertain terms. He also added the restriction that my niece is not to be alone with any of her children for the next 10 years. 10 years where she cannot be alone with her child over a stupid accident... I hate this for her.

Me
Ultrasound on Friday showed a heartbeat located in the uterus! I'm still having twinges and assume it is just a cyst, but I still haven't heard the official report from the doc.

I am reduced to pretty much eating jello and pudding as those don't hurt when they come back up.

I hate, loathe, despise, detest, etc. etc. etc. being pregnant. It is worth it in the end, but gee, if I could pick up a baby at Target, I'd be delighted. The only reason we go through pregnancy rather than adopt is because I do love the breastfeeding experience.

I hate the nausea and constant vomitting that lasts 6 months for me. I hate the baby kicking and adding to the constant seasick sensations. I hate being so uncomfortable. I hate feeling like I'm sharing my body with a little parasite for nine months. I hate the constipation. I hate the stretchmarks. Really, there is nothing about pregnancy I enjoy. Nothing.

It took me awhile to accept that and to realize it did not make me less of a woman or mother. Nor does it mean I love my children less. Nor does it mean I do not value the privilege of carrying a child. These all hold true, but I am miserable the entire nine months. For those of us who struggle with the 'ideal beaming pregnant mother' and falling short, there is nothing wrong with us. (((hugs))) to the other miserably pregnant.

6 comments:

Builder Mama said...

Yes, I too was a miserable pregnant person. And felt really guilty about it because 99.9% of my friends just adored being pregnant and looked adorable and never got sick. I was huge, sick for pretty much 2/3 of the pregnancy, got preeclampsia, and begged Joey every night to do an at-home c-section.

Sorry this one is so rough too...I was hoping you'd catch a break on the m/s this time!

joansy said...

Another I-hate-pregnancy mom here. And I didn't even have morning sickness. I hated the carpal tunnel syndrome, the fact that I couldn't drive after the fourth month, the endless doctor appointments, the back aches, the never ending need to pee, the fact that I couldn't take pain killers for the pain, and everything else too. And preeclampsia and hellp syndrome at the end just put it over the edge. It's a good thing for my girls that their twins, because there was no way that I was doing a second pregnancy.

But you know that in a relatively few short months that you'll have that beautiful baby and all of the misery will soon be pretty much forgotten. Until then, hang in there and know that your friends are pulling for you.

And 10 years of probation with that condition is insane. Maybe in a few years from now she can petition to have the condition removed. Damn.

Tree said...

I am so so sorry for your niece. I hope she does petition in a couple years and have it removed. I am thinking of her.

It is absolutely within your rights to hate being pregnant. It is not written anywhere that you have to enjoy it. You just have to enjoy the end result. And you will. And this will be behind you sooner than you think, you will be at that phase that you love - breastfeeding, rocking, singing lullabies and watching L & S with their new sibling.

Mitzi Green said...

um...she can't be alone with her kids for TEN FRIGGIN' YEARS but db gets to be alone with bob every other weekend? bull. friggin. $hit. maybe i should move to texas.

and i had a textbook pregnancy with zero problems and i hated it so much i vowed never to do it again.

aimee / greeblemonkey said...

I am so sorry for your niece. And so sorry for you during your PGs.

Keith said...

Uh, you are sharing your body with a parasite for 9 months. I assume that was the point. :)