Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Entertainment among the senior set

My dad bought a radar gun. His 'mission' is to get the speed limit on their street enforced. So, he is keeping record of how fast people fly down that street.

Lately, though, he has been exploring the entertainment value of owning a radar gun in a state where radar detectors are both legal and prevalent. Apparently, it's great fun to 'shoot' people driving way too fast just to watch their brake lights come on when their radar detector goes off. I imagine you could really mess with someone's mind with one of these gizmos.



Baby's first out loud giggles are magic. This evening, Miss A. gave me a good 5 minutes of giggling, chortling and belly laughs.

Of course, she made up for it by having a short screaming fit right before bedtime. She last pooped on Friday and has progressed to the point of gassiness. I'm expecting massive blowout any time now... Big sister S. was on an every 7 to 10 days poop schedule right around this age. Good kid managed to save up her explosions for daycare. Mr. W. and I seriously went several months without having to change a single poopy diaper.

Monday, April 14, 2008

Fly on the wall, II

Mrs. W.: I'm sorry.

Mr. W.: Hmmmm

Mrs. W.: I'm so, so sorry.

Mr. W.: Huh

Mrs. W.: I'm really sorry about your truck.

Mr. W.: How many times are you going to say you're sorry?

Mrs. W.: As many times as it takes for you to say, 'It's okay. It was an accident.'

Mr. W.: Oh! ... It's okay. It was an accident.

Yes, Mrs. W. managed to back the minivan into Mr. W.'s precious red truck. We have a big ole dent in the truck now. Fortunately, the van doesn't look like it took any more damage than what the accident did. *sigh*

Thursday, April 10, 2008

Security Deposit Forfeiture

To: Former Tenants
Re: Forfeiture of Security Deposit

Be it known that former Tenants, S., L. and A. have been found jointly and severally liable for the following damages.

1. Vericose veins: 1 on inner right calf;
2. Significant Stretchmarks: Lower, mid and upper belly plus chest and outer thigh;
3. Bust droopage;
4. Odd skin pigmentation: 2 brown spots on face; and
5. Sleep deprivation corrollating to the loss of 1 year life expectancy.

Former tenants may choose from the following options for repayment of structural damages:

Option A
1. Erase, remove or otherwise obliterate Vericose Veins;
2. Erase, remove or otherwise obliterate Significant Stretchmarks;
3. Repair and/or replace bust back to its original pre-tenancy condition;
4. Erase, remove or otherwise obliterate strange facial colorations; and
5. Permit Landlord to sleep in until 10 am each and every Saturday morning into perpetuity.

Option B
1. Provide hugs, kisses and 'I love you's into perpetuity;
2. Provide entertainment by way of cute child moments on into adulthood;
3. Provide stress while Landlord and Landlord's Partner attempt to prepare former tenants for adulthood.
4. Tenants are to cherish one another even in the midst of ridiculous bickering that has left Landlord feeling the urge to pierce her own eardrums; and
5. Tenants to serve as reminder for Landlord and Landlord's Partner's devotion to one another.

Be it known that Landlord hopes and prays that former tenants choose Option B. Landlord loves tenants very much even if she does experience some insecurity concerning her appearance post-tenancy.

Friday, April 04, 2008

Timeline - Or I Didn't Need This Right Now

How my Thursday went:

5:30 am - A. wakes up ready to eat. Diaper change, nursing session, back to sleep

6:00 am - Lay out clothes for L. hop in the shower, get dressed

6:30 am - L and S up out of bed, eat, dress, mess around

7:00 am - A up again and ready to eat

7:30 am - load everyone up and out the door

7:45 am - drop S. off at school

8:10 am - rear ended while on the way to drop off L and A, minor tension headache worsens considerably. L. very angry that I allowed the bump to happen. Nobody hurt.

8:45 am - Still waiting for officer to finish paper work and L has to potty NOW. Use potty in back of van (thank you, Mr. W. for ensuring we are prepared for this sort of emergency).

9:00 am - Finally get A and L to school.

9:20 am - Finally get me to work, call mom and boohoo on the phone a few minutes

10:00 am - Call to agent of guy who rear ended me and give claim info. All's good and claim will be paid

10:10 am - Call to body shop that has already replaced our bumper twice. Consider asking them if they can replace with flourescent pink this time.

12:00 pm - Call from claims office. Further claim information taken and all is good.

12:10 pm - Another call from claims office. Claim is denied after all since driver was excluded. Driver all kinds of apologetic and wants to pay my damages out of his pocket.
Tension headache getting really bad at this point

1:00 pm - Call to body shop to ask their experiences with having another pay for repairs. Trying to decide if I want my insurance company to deal with him or just do it myself. Ultimately decide I want to let my insurance company deal.

1:30 pm - Call to guy's agent to make sure he knew what was going on. I suspect there may be an E&O issue, but don't plan to mention that to anyone involved.

1:40 pm - Call to my insurance co. to set up claim. Very nice claims rep answered all my questions. She needs to verify that the accident will be covered under Uninsured Motorist (it will be), which will be to my financial benefit.

4:45 pm - Headache bad enough that I decide to go home. Halfway there, realize I left claim paperwork on my desk. Go to call Mr. W. to ask him to grab it when I realize the cell phone was left on top of the paperwork. Briefly consider returning to the office to get phone and paper work but decide not to.

5:00 pm - Pull into Sonic to buy a strawberry limeade. About to head out without tasting the drink first, and realize what kind of day I've had. Take a big swig and realize that the drink is very, very, very wrong. Wait 5 minutes for them to change out the Sprite machine and fix a new drink.

5:10 pm - Get home and realize I don't have the clicker to the garage door and the front door is chained. Fool with the gate to get into the backyard and hope and pray the bees that have been hanging around our back door are gone. Get in the house, put an ice pack on my neck, lay down on the couch with my drink and call my mom again.

This was a pretty yucky day, but it would have been unbearably worse if my foot had slipped off the brake when the guy hit us.

Wednesday, April 02, 2008

Pavlov would be so proud...

Back in late February, I broke out ye olde breastpump. I was having trouble with too much milk production and needed (among other things) some tubing for my breastpump ASAP. So off to the medical supply place I went with baby in tow. They had the tubing at around 2x the price I could have ordered it elsewhere, but it was a bit of an emergency. After we got home, I nursed A. put her to bed and then started up a pot of water to boil for sterilizing the tubes. Once the tubes were boiled and as emptied of water as I could get them, I hooked them up to the pump. In the past, I've used the pump to air dry my the silicone tubes faster. It is a matter of attaching the tubes and turning the pump on without anything else attached. Interestingly enough, the 'girls' remembered the sound of the pump and immediately let down just a ton of milk all over the place. I did grab a bottle and 'caught' 3.5 ounces or so. Arf, arf!


Today's my first day back at work, and in a truly boneheaded moment, I only brought three bottles to pump in. I have a stack of baggies for breastmilk storage still sitting at home, where they're just a big help right now. The three bottles have been full for a few hours, and I could really stand to pump right now. However, I just can't seem to bring myself to dump out any milk... Thinking about my baby causes my milk to let down, and well, let's just say I'm VERY thankful I wore my Lily Padz today. I don't usually leak, so I wore them mostly so I don't show through my shirt, if you know what I mean. However, leaking is definitely an issue right now.

Can anyone say 'conditioned response going awry'?

Pavlov's Wikipedia entry

Tuesday, April 01, 2008

Fly on the wall

Mrs W.: *crying*

Mr. W.: I'm sorry.

Mrs. W.: *sniffing*

Mr. W.: I'm so, so sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you.

Mrs. W.: *sniff**sniff* I know, but you can be such a stupid man sometimes.

Mr. W.: I know. I'm sorry.

To be completely fair to Mr. W. This was a case of minor dumb man syndrome combined with minor post partum hormonal fluctuation. You know those medications that warn not to take with alcohol because combined they can be fatal? There should be a warning not to combine dumb man syndrome with postpartum hormones.